Update on past articles

NYC’s Bill A5430 is dead already. Didn’t take long either. It almost sounds like his colleagues might think Michael DenDekker demonstrated extremely bad judgment, or is at least out of touch with the rest of the state.

The guy with the bat mentioned here is now on trial. Bryce Barker hasn’t presented a very good argument for why he attacked a bicycle with a bat, either. The following word may or may not be related to this article.

Dumbass.

Would a Range Rover enthusiast really be impressed by the Range Rover Evoque concept bicycle? Because from the carbon fiber frame to the aerospace alloy bars to the oversize stem, it’s more common than a New Beetle. Not even enough to make your average cycling enthusiast yawn.

Finally, I will once again offend Grant Ryan, inventor of the YikeBike. Not because his little scooter isn’t clever, but because of the insistence that it’s some sort of bicycle. It weighs twenty pounds, tops out at 14MPH, and goes a whopping six miles on a single charge. For $3,600. Did I mention it will set you back nearly four bills? What? You want to know if you can pedal it to go faster, or if the battery dies? No, um, it doesn’t have pedals. I might have referred to it as an “electric bar stool” or something similar before.

Anderson Cooper, if you want to be taken seriously, iron your collar, and find something truly newsworthy. A $3,600 electric scooter is not going to change the world. Even worse, the Huffington Post ran the same damn thing the following day. Now, if Grant reads this, let me say a few things. First, I love Kiwis. Not just the fruit. The country is full of the nicest folks on the planet. Americans could learn a thing or two from them. Perhaps they’re so nice because they live in one of the most beautiful pair of islands in the world. Still, I digress. It’s a pretty cool design, the YikeBike. But it’s a scooter, it’s electric, and it’s nowhere near as “green” as a bicycle. Put a NuVinci hub inside with some pedals outside, cut the price in half, and I will bow at your feet like Wayne and Garth meeting Alice Cooper.

[/rant]

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